Do You Ever Feel Like Someone Else Has Stolen Your Life?

I really hate it when people pretend like everything is perfect in their life just for appearances. Lets be honest, NOBODY is happy with everything. And if you are and you are in your twenties you must be some kind of freak of nature. A lucky freak of nature, but one nonetheless. I'd rather be upfront with my friends. My relationships aren't what I want them to be or I thought I'd be in a different place in my life by this age. Then, sometimes I see people who have exactly what I want that are my age- and even more vomit inducing, younger.

Before you say anything, I get it. The way they look to me on the outside might not be how they actually are. At this point, I'll take the facade. I just don't understand how things are happening for these other people and not for myself. I'm the biggest believer that you are the only one who has the power to change your own life. But what happens when the changes you try to make don't work and leave you feeling well, powerless. I don't want to hop on the bitter train, but sometimes it's really hard to make sense of it all. I want to fulfill myself in all of these ways but I keep trying different tactics to make changes and when there aren't any results it feels like I'm banging my head against a wall. What's worse, is having to see other people that are somehow successfully making these changes and excelling. Sometimes I feel like they stole the life I was supposed to have like when Dr. Evil stole Austin Powers's mojo.

How do you keep yourself out of a funk when nothing you're doing is working? Do you guys ever feel this way? Do you have any tips on what to do when it's getting you down?

xo,

Wannabe

I Want To Be The Fairest Of Them All- A Response To Apocalypstick's Post

I was reading my good friend Apocalystick's blog last night and she had written a new post called Mirror Error. She posted about not being happy about the way she looked and wasn't looking for compliments to pour in, but rather to vent about how she was feeling about herself.

You can read Mirror Error here: http://apocalypstick.com/2011/08/22/mirror-error/

Some of the comments told her (and her readers) how damaging celebrity culture and women in the media are. How that look isn't attainable and how we can't compare ourselves to celebrities. While I agree with the comments that being "you" is a gift and that you should celebrate your uniqueness it got me thinking.

I will admit it. I want the body of a celebrity. I want to be a celebrity. I diet, exercise, and obsess daily about my body. My ideal changes weekly. Sometimes it's Fergie (singer, not the Duchess), Nicole Richie, Jessica Biel, and a variety of others. Yes, it is very difficult to both attain and maintain that type of body- but it is possible and if you want it and are willing to work for it I don't see a problem with that. I want to look the best that I can look. Why should I chalk it up to "oh they're famous"? To me that's saying that they are different than I am, which clearly I don't believe. They may be in a different place in their career at the moment but we are all the same and if they can do it, so can I.

I have one friend who I love very dearly and is the closest thing I will every have to a sibling. But she's always telling me to stop worrying so much about my career when I'm staying up late rehearsing for an audition or writing a new script all night. But it is people that go that extra mile that end up making it, at least in the industry I want to be in. Nobody is forcing me to do this. This is the life and career path that I've chosen and why shouldn't I want to make it to the top? I don't want to meander in the middle somewhere. Yes, I watch what I eat everyday. I turn down a lot of nights out to stay in and work on projects. But I don't think I should be judged for wanting more.

Mediocrity is fine with some people. They want their 9-5PM job and make enough money to be comfortable. I don't judge them for that. So I shouldn't be judged for wanting the best in life. The best body, the best career, the best boyfriend. I don't want to settle for anything.

Sometimes it's OK to want to change things about yourself. And we all have the power to control and change those things. Thanks Apocalypstick! And btw you're super hot!

XO,

Wannabe